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In a world where our worth is often measured by success and recognition, it's easy to lose sight of what's really important. The desire for appreciation can consume us and trap us in an endless search for praise. How to get out of this trap? We find inspiration in the Bible — in the story of the Apostle Paul and in the example of Jesus himself.
Why the desire for recognition destroys us
Nowadays, we are driven to strive for success. Admiration from others, fame, recognition — all of these things the ego often presents to us as the most important thing in life. How do we feel when someone appreciates our work? It's great for a while, isn't it? It tickles our ego and we start to feel important. That's natural. When we achieve something we want and others see it, we feel that our value increases. But what happens when this starts to set the course of our lives?
Sometimes there are times when we discover that this need for recognition can not only confuse us, but also destroy us. Once we begin to measure our worth by what others think of us, we quickly discover that success is not permanent. For a while something succeeds, for a while people admire us, but what happens if we lose it? How quickly will everything change once we lose what we were basing ourselves on? When the ego grows, the soul dies.
In his book Ego Is the Enemy, Ryan Holiday describes three natural steps in our lives:
- aspirations
- success
- malfunctioning
In all these moments, our greatest enemy is the ego, which wants us to strive for success, and the moment we lose it, it begins to humiliate and break us down. When we strive for something, our pride whispers to us that we do not need to learn from anyone, that we can do it on our own. When we succeed, we tell ourselves how unique we are and that we can afford anything. And when we fail, we feel that we are zero and should never try anything again.
Why/by whom is our value defined?
The story of the Apostle Paul can help us discover how difficult and important it is to keep the right perspective — when people start worshiping us or when they start hating us. Imagine getting into a situation where people are celebrating you for something you've done—whether it's a big project at work, a perfect diploma, or some other accomplishment. You can feel it bringing you up, don't you? And now imagine that you are the Apostle Paul, who has just arrived in the small town of Lystra in southern Turkey.
Paul and Barnabas came to this city, and after the miraculous healing of a man who had never walked, they immediately became heroes to all. People even considered them gods -- Zeus and Hermes came among them, they thought. Immediately they began to celebrate them, they wanted to worship them, to offer them sacrifices. Now imagine if you were in their place. Will you accept the glory? Do you imagine that now everyone recognizes your achievements and praises you? What would you do? It would be easy to get carried away and start believing you deserve all this attention. But Paul decided otherwise.
He tore his clothes, which was a sign of strong disapproval in the culture of the time, and told the people that neither he nor Barnabas were any gods. He refused all that recognition. Paul knew that his life was not about what people thought of him. He came to show the truth about the one God, not himself. He didn't want them to worship him, but the Biblical God. And that almost cost him his life. The people who worshiped him suddenly turned around and went to stone him. And when they thought that Paul was dead, they dragged his body out of the city.
This is a crucial lesson for all of us. Success is fleeting. In an instant, we can lose everything we have.
How to Stay Strong Even When Everyone Leaves You
And now comes the key question -- how do you manage to live it all in everyday life? How not to be dominated by the desire for recognition when it is so natural? Jesus is a great example. Paul faced recognition as well as stoning. Jesus faced the same situation on a deeper level. When he came to Jerusalem, the people welcomed him as king. “Hosana! “, they shouted, waving palm branches. But a few days later, the same people shouted, “Crucify him! We don't want Jesus! “How quickly everything can change.
Like Paul, Jesus knew that his worth was not determined by what others said about him. He did not come to be worshipped or celebrated. He came to save us. Awareness of mission and meaning is what can free us from the pressure to be someone. When we focus on what God tells us about us and what he prepares for us, and not on what others think of us, we find true freedom. A freedom that does not depend on success or failure, but on faith in what God has prepared for us.
True Freedom: Humility, Gratitude and Resilience
True freedom comes when we stop seeking recognition from others. When we stop being dependent on how others see us, we can start living a life that has real meaning. How to live without being hit by success or failure? When, instead of pursuing glory, we seek God's plan for our lives, we get something wonderful — inner peace and meaning.
When we go through the three mentioned stages of life, our attitudes change in them: in our aspirations, suddenly we will humble, in their achievements grateful and in their failures durable.
This is what God wants to bring into our lives. Humility, gratitude and resilience are key. When we accept in life that everything good comes to us from God, we begin to focus on what is really important to us. We will be strong, confident and resilient in our mission, because our values will not depend on the opinions of others. And that's true freedom -- to live a life that's not about what others think of us, but about immersing ourselves in what God shows us is ahead.
